Decision Time… Again!

Hello there, it’s been a while!  I’ve been immersed in teaching my class out here on the island and have let myself take a break from thinking about all of this IVF/TTC stuff (at least most of the time- but of course it’s always around, lurking in the background).  But it has resurfaced in the last few weeks because we are trying to decide if we are going to go forward with our FET in December.  The more pressing decision is that I have to decide whether or not to teach another class in LA (2 hours away from where I live) starting in January.

I am really struggling with this decision, and was hoping I’d get some clarity by now.  I think that doing the transfer in December (it would be late December), and teaching the class would be a bad idea- I don’t think I would feel confident that I was giving us our best shot at the transfer succeeding with the extra stress and driving, and feeling unhealthy in LA.  So, the question is, do I not teach and do the transfer, or do I teach and wait to do the transfer until March?  There are several reasons why I don’t want to wait, one being that we will have to pay more to keep the embryos frozen, but also if we end up doing two transfers (of my 3 embryos), and none of it works, it will be another 6 months from now and we’ll be back to square one.  I don’t know that we will even consider doing another IVF, but either way, I’ll be a solid 35 and a half or more by the time we could even try anything else.  Obviously teaching would put a little $ back in the bank (I stress little), which would help after IVF has taken so much out, but there’s a chance we might have to get a new car for all of the driving, which would ultimately take a lot more out than I’d be putting in with teaching!  The reason is, while I’ve been out here on the island, my husband got rear-ended in my car and there may be structural damage that could end up totaling the car- but we won’t know for sure until we take it in for the repairs.  Nothing is ever simple!

Then there’s a trip we booked to Mexico in February, which complicates things a little too- if we do the transfer, and if it works (!!), I’d have to bring along all of the progesterone shot stuff which I’d be a bit nervous flying with especially since I don’t speak enough Spanish to be able to explain a bag full of needles!  If I teach, I’d have to possibly cancel a class and rearrange some of the curriculum, or we might have to compress our time there a bit depending on the flights.

Deciding not to teach could likely also close the door on this opportunity- while I enjoy teaching this class, doing it in LA is really far from ideal.  I’ve made it happen for 3 years now, and I’m kind of at my limit.  But I also don’t have any other work I’d actually get paid for lined up closer to home.  If the transfer is successful I’d be fine with taking a break from teaching for a while, but if it’s not, I’m afraid I’ll feel even worse about everything if I’ve given up this position.  After everything we’ve been through, I just want to give the embryos the best chance at success that I can, and to me, being in LA is the opposite of that!  And I thought having the embryos on ice and being able to choose the timing might make things easier- HA!  I guess it would if I was more willing to wait until March to do a transfer!

Any insight from you ladies would be helpful- I know there’s never a perfect time, but how do you make these tough decisions?

Anyway, time to get ready for another dive- I leave you with a photo of some island diving!